What in the world happened last Wed night?!!

I realize that events/situations happen everyday around me that i am COMPLETELY unaware of. Things that are out of my sight/vision and events that i may see with my very own eyes but still do not fully comprehend what is going on.

As a born-again Christian, having the Holy Spirit living in me & guiding me, I have the One true God dwelling in ME! I am a human with a natural body who has God's Spirit in me, with God's Super Natural power, insight & strength.

The scripture speaks of  Spiritual battle happening daily, all around us:

Ephesians 6:12 "For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms."


We can't always SEE with our physical eyes, but many times i can see/feel the Spiritual battle.
(me sharing my testimony at an event in Santa Ana, close to the neighborhood where our Bible study is)

Last Wednesday evening Danny & I arrived at this street at dark, around 6:30pm. We have many people backing us up in prayer. Over a year of weekly ministry, friendship building/follow-up has taken place.This is the FIRST time in DECADES for this street to have a home church/Bible study!!! God, as always, gets the credit! Our Lives Worth Saving Gang Intervention team this year has really helped them out w/their physical needs & stayed well connected.

We spend almost 3 hours praying, catching up, fellowshipping, and planning for Wed 11/28/12, Wed evening. Our 1st official Bible study teaching. The whole family was excited to see us & very welcoming. Two other women from the apartment complex came & joined us. We had deep spiritual conversations & were sharing each other's testimonies & bond.The family who is graciously opening up their home to us is playing a HUGE part in the revival of this street & city. I know God will bless them tremendously.

At around 7:30pm a fight broke out outside & we heard yelling. After 30min the fight stopped, as we prayed in the apartment for peace, in Jesus name.

At around 9pm Danny & i leave & say goodnight to everyone. As we are walking down the driveway of the complex, we walk past 2 guys in their late 20s/early 30s standing there, right outside the apartment. We say "God bless you" as we pass by them. As we walked toward the parking lot, Danny turns around & says a sentence that still, a week later, still trips me out & shocks me "Those two guys were gang members, posting up outside for the  last 3 hours to guard us so that if anyone tried to mess with us or cause trouble, they'd be standing alert in front of the apartment."  My jaw instantly dropped. I was speechless for a moment. What??!!!!   Let me get this straight, i was unaware that for the last 3 hours we were in that apartment doing ministry, these 2 men, who are legit gang members & don't even know me, are watching our backs & guarding us out of respect for us. WOW! Now i am not happy that they are in a gang, but just to see God making peace with people who could easily be our enemies, is unheard of & frankly, a MIRACLE! This stuff doesn't just happen regularly. And i know that God had His guardian angels protecting us. Those 2 men were risking their lives for us, when  i don't even know if they know God or not. They were not young gangsters either, they were older experienced ones!!! But I believe God is already working on their hearts, "behind the scenes" & beyond what my natural eyes can see!

Proverbs 16:7 "When a man's ways are pleasing to the LORD, he makes even his enemies live at peace with him."

(i used to visualize angels as wimpy people with white wings, but now i believe my guardian angels are warriors!!)

Thank  you for your prayers. Every "little" thing is a BIG thing, if you know what i mean. Progress & revival is happening on this street in Santa Ana & in this city. Lives are being changed right in front of my very own eyes. The beautiful thing is seeing the father/husband of this household turn to the LORD & now he is trying to reach out to gang members who he knows & who still look up to him & respect him. He has INFLUENCE on this street & in this neighborhood. Despite the evilness that goes on here, God's will is being done!

Tomorrow night, Wed 11/28...  6:30pm-9pm, we are at it again!!! Soldiers on the frontline. The LORD will be victorious.

His Servant,
Para-Chaplain Michelle Smith

Update on Special Events with the Teens!!!

Hey there! It's been a very busy few months! On top of teaching weekly Bible studies, one on one visits, discipleship sessions,church services to incarcerated youth & weekend gang intervention on the streets w/Lives Worth Saving, I have helped out & attended several Special events the last month at different locations!

Hebrews 13:3 "Continue to remember those in prison as if you were together with them in prison, and those who are mistreated as if you yourselves were suffering."

Friday October 5th: we had our annual Retreat event at Youth Guidance Center in Santa Ana! A unique opportunity to eat pizza, play volleyball, have big group & small group discussions & activities with them for 5 straight hours!!!(we usually just get 1 hour) We had 21 young men & women participate. These teens are involved weekly in our Bible studies and church services. I had a chance to get to know some of the Probation Staff members also, they need LOVE too! I was reminded that even though our focus is the youth, God uses our words & actions to be His witness daily to the staff. They watch & hear everything that we do & say!The young men especially opened up to us more than usual that day, while they shared about their growing up experiences & their relationship (or lack of) with their parents/relatives & how it has positively or negatively affected them. Chaplain Rick did an excellent job at organizing this event & leading it.I helped lead the small group for the girls near the end & i shared about purity & how God views beauty VS what the world says beauty is. Shared parts of my painful testimony of eating disorders/depression/bad dating & relationship choices in the past & my journey to believe God thinks i'm beautiful & that i'm His masterpiece!

Psalm 139 says we are FEARFULLY & WONDERFULLY MADE!!!! RECEIVE IT & BELIEVE IT!

Saturday October 13th: Chaplain Rick Johnson & I went to the annual Hoopla Basketball Tournament event hosted by The Bible Church of Buena Park.(My favorite sport is basketball, i so wanted to play!!!!I used to play & coach for many years!)  It was a fun field  trip for 16 teen boys & Probation staff to leave their Youth Guidance Center & Joplin Youth Center facilities for several hours & play some good ol' ball outdoors & compete! 2 boys who were recently released showed up to join the rest of the boys to play also. Anytime we get a chance to spend time with the teens, i ALWAYS make sure they KNOW that God loves them, has a plan for them & has NOT GIVEN UP ON THEM! I always ask them if they want prayer & they rarely turn that down! So i prayed for them on the court sidelines, listened to their stories & struggles & shared verses of God's scripture w/them. It was great to high five them & cheer for them competing in something POSITIVE & see the teamwork between the players. We ate burgers with them & there was a guest speaker who shared the Gospel (guy in the middle of the pic!)

 

Friday October 26th: i attended the Graduation Ceremony at Youth Guidance Center (Drug Treatment Center for incarcerated teen boys and girls) It was my 1st graduation ceremony i have ever been to at a youth facility and it was so touching!! I was like a proud mama bear cheering for her teenagers! Several teenagers received their high school diplomas & gave incredible speeches. They were given a rose to walk into the audience & hand to the 1 person who inspired them/supported them. Tears ran down my face as i saw each teen locate their mentor/family member/teacher/supporter who meant the world to them, as both parties hugged & cried! Very emotional moment. There were also many teens who received their GEDs, which is still a huge accomplishment for them! After the ceremony i was able to meet a few of the teens' family members for the first time & let them know how proud i was of their son or daughter/grandson. Seeing them finish their schooling encouraged me & inspired me!!!! Against all their battles & obstacles they are facing, God gives them strength to do what many feel is impossible!!! I was honored to watch them all dressed up in suits, ties & dresses, walking proudly down the aisle with their heads up high, with bright hopes for their future!!!

 

Luke 1:37 "For NOTHING is impossible with God!"

 

As you can see, being a Para-Chaplain is NOT just a week day job! I never clock out! If i am not there physically at the 5 different Orange County facilities ministering with teens, i am in the neighborhoods of Santa Ana on the streets reaching out to gang members & their families, praying, fundraising, writing blogs(haha), preparing Bible study  or church service lessons, studying the Word, etc. I thank God everyday for this honor, privilege & huge blessing to even be a part of these troubled teens & their families.

 

THEY INSPIRE ME!

 

In order for me to continue this awesome ministry God has called me to fulltime, i am in need of your prayer  support and financial support! I depend on donations in order to pay for my living expenses/bills/gas  etc. If you feel led to give, the info is on the right side of this site! May His peace & love be felt today.As the holiday season is here, the youth have a very tough time being locked up & we have several more events coming up soon to minister to them during Nov and December. Please keep these events in prayers!

 

Para-Chaplain Michelle Smith aka Rebel for Jesus!!!!

 

 

 

 

 

God's Promises!

Last Tues August 28th, this gorgeous rainbow over Juvenile Hall reminded me of God's Promises after i spent the prior hour reminding the incarcerated youth.They have a difficult time trusting other people because most of their lives were crushed by broken promises & no steady foundation to rely on.(God knew i also needed the BIG reminder up in the sky that evening!)

We have ALL broken a promise to someone before, even if our intentions were to follow it through. We have ALL had other people break their promises to us, causing disappointment & mistrust.

I have encouraging  news for you &I!!! God NEVER breaks His promises to us!! He is ALWAYS a Man of His Word.He paints a majestic RAINBOW in the sky as a constant reminder of this.  The following are just a few of the many promises He has for those who have FAITH & BELIEVE in Him:

Hebrews 13:5
"I will never leave you nor forsake you. "



Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you,' says the Lord. 'They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope."

Matthew 11:28-29

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls."

Isaiah 40:29-31
"He gives power to the weak
and strength to the powerless.
Even youths will become weak and tired,
and young men will fall in exhaustion.
But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength.
They will soar high on wings like eagles.
They will run and not grow weary.
They will walk and not faint."

Philippians 4:19
"And this same God who takes care of me will supply all your needs from his glorious riches, which have been given to us in Christ Jesus."



Romans 8:37-39
"No, despite all these things, overwhelming victory is ours through Christ, who loved us.
And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord."

Proverbs 1:33
"But all who listen to me will live in peace,
untroubled by fear of harm.”

John 14:27
“I am leaving you with a gift—peace of mind and heart. And the peace I give is a gift the world cannot give. So don’t be troubled or afraid.



Romans 10:9
"If you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved."



Romans 6:23
"For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life through Christ Jesus our Lord."


John 4:13, 14
"Jesus answered and said unto her, Whosoever drinketh of this water shall thirst again: But whosoever drinketh of the water that I shall give him shall never thirst; but the water that I shall give him shall be in him a well of water springing up into everlasting life."

John 10:27-30
"My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me: And I give unto them eternal life; and they shall never perish, neither shall any man pluck them out of my hand. My Father, which gave them me, is greater than all; and no man is able to pluck them out of my Father’s hand. I and my Father are one."

Matthew 7:7,8
"Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you: For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened."

***These PROMISES we can TRUST & plant our HOPE in. This doesn't even begin to scratch the surface of ALL of God's Promises He gives us, but i pray that it encourages you!***

God promises to provide for His children, and He has definitely PROVIDED for me & continues to leave me in awe. He is TRUST WORTHY!

Matthew 6:33
"But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you."




Love in Christ,
Michelle Smith   aka  Warrior for Him!

 

 

Rock Harbor Field Trip!

Saturday August 25th Pacific Youth Correctional Ministries had a field trip for 25 incarcerated teenagers. Chaplain Rick and I and a few other volunteers were able to spend a good 5hours of quality time with these teen boys and girls.Rock Harbor Church in Costa Mesa holds 10+ years of memories for me. It was the church i went to right out of highschool, through all of my college years from 18yrs old-29yrs old. It is where God sparked my  heart for serving Him and others with the gifts and talents He has given me----> locally and globally! Very thankful for this church and the heart they have to worship God and reach out into the community and around the world!!

These teens were from 3 of the 4 different facilities that Pacific Youth ministers to in Orange County: Joplin Youth Center, Youth Leadership Academy (YLA), and Youth Guidance Center (YGC).

They arrived around 4pm and we had dinner and refreshments catered to them at Rock Harbor in Costa Mesa before the 6pm service. It was a blessed time of fellowship and getting to know them. Several of the teens had attended my Bible studies in YLA or church services we hold at Juvenile Hall so it was good to be able to sit down and have my 1st meal with them!:

After dinner and good conversations we headed into a different room to sit and hear the powerful life stories of Becky Tirabassi and Mikey Place. They shared with the teens how God had dramatically and radically changed their lives and delivered them from substance abuse and a life of destruction and a spiral of sin. Mikey used to be incarcerated in Juvenile Hall and now God has opened doors for him to be accepted into Calvary Chapel Bible college and people have donated to cover his tuition/boarding. Mikey was able to grow in the LORD while being ministered to through Pacific Youth Ministry during his time being locked up. What a great success story of seeds being planted and God reaping a Harvest!!! It is so encouraging to me. It was great to hear these teen boys hear the story of hope and transformation.

Here is a picture of Mikey sharing his testimony.He did a great job, God spoke mightily through him. ( i am sooo proud of him!!!):

 

After the testimony sharing we went to the 6pm service. The message tonight was perfectly planned by God: topic of suffering and carrying heavy burdens  (James 5). 

 

When the teens attend church services at the facilities (YLA, Juvenile Hall,Joplin & YGC) they have to sit in their seats. Saturday evening at Rock Harbor, we all ROCKED OUT!! No one was seated and every single one of the 25 teens were standing up, clapping, smiling, laughing and singing out loud!! It was a whole new atmosphere experience for them, and they absolutely LOVED it. I loved watching them be so joyful and excited to sing. It was the most joy and peace i had seen in them, ever!! It was good seeing them let their guards down and just worship the LORD freely.

 

Afterwards, many of the teenagers told me that they would love to visit Rock Harbor again or another church when they get released. For some of them, it was their first time EVER at any church. Everyone was on their best behavior and it looked like the Probation Staff had a good time also and were blessed by the evening.

 

I got an opportunity to pray over several young men who are getting released in the next few days. May they continue to seek the LORD and read His Word.

 

Saturday was unforgettable for me and the teenagers. I will never forget the JOY on their faces and the excitement they had. Please pray that these 25 teens continue to seek His face and grow in Him. Thank you for your support and prayers!!!!

 

Sunday August 26th :Chaplain Rick & i taught the church services at Juvenile Hall and Youth Guidance Center and we had 65 teenagers attend. Some of  the teens who went on the Sat field trip told me that their voices were almost gone & their hands hurt from clapping and singing so loud @ Rock Harbor. That made me smile.

 

My support account is very low at the moment...if you would like to help support me & this ministry with the teens, the donation info is on the right hand side of this page.Every amount helps! ------->     

 

His Servant,

Michelle Smith

The F Word

 The big F Word....

FORGIVENESS!

 

 

"Bitterness is like swallowing a bottle of poison-and waiting for the other person to die"
~Jon Courson
 

We ALL have been hurt by other people in our lives & we ALL  have hurt other people. The way we DEAL with that hurt will impact the HEALTH of our life (and the lives around us): It affects our mind, thoughts, heart, actions, relationships, etc.

 

When we do wrong to someone else by our actions or words, we  usually desire to be forgiven. To be shown grace & hear those precious words "I forgive you." What a beautiful relief to hear those words!! Lifts a burden off of us & off them.When we are wronged by someone else, we are challenged with the command by God to forgive them.  

 

Let's look at what God says about the F word:

Ephesians 4:31 "Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger..."

 

Matthew 6:15 "But if you do not forgive men  their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins."

 

Ephesians 4:32-5:1 "Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you. Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children."

 

Romans 12:19 "Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written 'it is mine to avenge. I will repay,' says the LORD."

 

Psalm 86:5 "For You LORD are good, and ready to forgive."

 

Mark 11:25 "And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him."

 

Proverbs 19:11 "A man's wisdom gives him patience; it is to his glory to overlook an offense."

 

Isaiah 43:25 "I, even I, am He who blots out your transgressions, for My own sake, and remembers your sins no more."

 

1 Corinthians 13:4-5 "Love is patient, love is kind...it keeps no record of wrongs."

 

These are just a few of many verses addressing the HEART ISSUE of forgiveness. If we waited till we FELT like forgiving someone, we would probably never forgive them!

 

I am writing this blog because FORGIVENESS is difficult for me at times when someone has deeply hurt me. Forgiving my own self is hard at times also. I am so critical &  hard on myself (a perfectionist mentality), i often am able to show grace to others before i am able to extend grace to myself. God's working on me with that  :)

 

I am writing this blog to confess,  that i was just made aware today (while i was doing discipleship with a teen girl @ Juvenile Hall, discussing forgiveness) how i have been bitter towards a certain person who had severely hurt me not that long ago. I invested over 3yrs in this person &  was betrayed, lied to, taken advantage of, used, manipulated, and despite me  being faithful, loyal & loving....they were unfaithful & not loyal at all. I thought i had forgiven this person for the heart ache & pain they had caused me, but i just realized today that if i am still holding that record of wrongs against them, i have still not fully forgiven them. They broke my trust towards others & i still struggle with trust due to being deceived.  Oh how i wish they would call me up & say "i am so sorry for all of the hurt i caused you, will you forgive me?" but i know the chance of that happening is VERY rare. So as i write this blog, i am confessing that i struggle with this. I NEED Christ's strength to fully forgive this man. 

 

I am so thankful that when God forgives us of our sins, He doesn't keep a record of them!! Aren't you???  When we place our faith in Jesus Christ & trust in Him, we are redeemed by His bloodshed sacrifice on the Cross. He looks at us as if we are white as snow, as if we never sinned. Completely justified!  I wish i could always see myself the way He sees me.Spotless. Blameless:

 

Isaiah 1:18 "Come now, and let us reason together," Says the Lord, "Though your sins are as scarlet, They will be as white as snow; Though they are red like crimson, They will be like wool."

 

We remember the things we've done & said & the painful things others have done & said to us & wish that we could erase them & forget.

 

If i ever ran into this person who betrayed me, i would hope & pray that i could look them in the eyes & say "i forgive you." 

 

I want to add that...forgiveness DOES NOT mean excusing that person for what they did. It means RELEASING that person & the PAIN, HURT, ANGER & BITTERNESS.

 

The Greek meaning of "forgive" means to: "let go, to give up and to keep no longer".

In Hebrew, the word "grudge" means the opposite: "to keep, to hold onto"

 

I remember when i was 24yrs old & had just ended a physically/emotionally/verbally abusive relationship with my fiance. I struggled for a few years with forgiving the traumatic pain & hurt he had caused through out the year & a half we were dating. I know it should not have taken me that long to forgive him. Part of that was my pride & another part of that was not understanding what TRUE forgiveness was. I thought i had to come to the point of "maturity" where i FELT like forgiving him. Well,  guess what?!! I never felt like it & years went by & i realized how my bitterness, anger, hurt & fear had affected my own life & other peoples' lives around me. I carried that hurt & resentment with me like a poison inside me.Thanks to God's strength i can say today that i forgive him & i now am able to share that past story with many people who have been or are going through similiar situations of being a victim of abuse. I am NOT a victim of him or that relationship anymore, because God has HEALED my heart  & because He has given me the strength to forgive & let it go.

 

Is there someone (maybe yourself) who you need to forgive? Are you bitter towards someone?

 

I challenge you to ask yourself & ask God  to search your heart. I thought i was "over it" & had forgiven the last man who hurt me & cheated on me, but then his name was mentioned & i reacted with bitterness. I had swept my unforgiveness under the carpet hoping it wouldn't surface again, but it did. So now i am giving it to God, even though i don't FEEL like forgiving him at all. I release the pain & heartache to the LORD.

 

I have been forgiven by others & shown grace. Most of all, i have been forgiven for my huge DEBT OF  SIN by my Father in Heaven. Who am i to say who shouldn't be forgiven? I am not worthy of being forgiven, so i need to freely forgive back.

 

I share with the incarcerated teens daily about love & forgiveness, yet today i did some deep heart surgery & found out that i had a root of unforgiveness in me. I am confronting that tonight & will be writing a letter to that person. But i will not mail this letter. It will be between me & God. After writing it i will rip it up & be done with it, letting it go FOREVER!

 

Is there someone you need to write a letter to or about? This may be a tangible way to release your emotions to God & allow His love to heal your heart so you can be 100% at peace  & healthy again.

 

LET'S SHOW MORE GRACE, COMPASSION & MERCY. LESS HATE, BITTERNESS & ANGER.

 

Thanks for reading & for your love & support. Love, Michelle

 

Leviticus 19:18 "Never seek revenge or bear a grudge against anyone, but love your neighbor  as yourself. I am the LORD."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 







Children waiting for a loving home...

Psalm 46:1 "God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble."

Place yourself in these shoes for a moment...

You are a 7yr old scared and hurt child. Abused by your own family members.The people who you have trusted to take care of you each day have neglected you. One day you are taken away from your home. A home that should have been a refuge, a safe loving place of shelter. But instead, it was an atmosphere of fear, pain, hurt and uncertainty. 

You are taken to a beautiful facility called Orangewood. A community of loving staff. Houses, schools, playgrounds, and many other children younger than you and older than you.Beautiful flowers and trees everywhere you look. Uncertain if/when you will ever be able to return back home and realizing that you are going to have to adapt to a new home.

Thoughts running through your mind... 
"Will  i ever find someone who loves me? Someone who will take care of me and not hurt me and someone who will protect me? Will i be forgotten here? Will i be adopted soon? How long will i have to wait until i am back in my own family again? Is this MY  fault this happened? Do i have worth and value? I am hurt, i need a healing touch!"

Orangewood Children and Family Center in Orange is another facility that is under the umbrella of Pacific Youth Ministries. I have only visited there a few times to help with the Wed Bible study with Chaplain Steve Matten. I have enjoyed those visits. I am in the process of doing the paperwork /Livescan fingerprinting needed to minister there regularly! Here are some facts/statistics on Orangewood:
**It is a 24 hour emergency shelter care facility operated and owned by the County of Orange Social Services Agency. It opened its doors in 1985 (same year Pacific Youth became a non-profit org ministry)**

Age Range:    8%   Under 1year
                       27% 1-5 yr old
                       25%  6-12yr old
                       40%   13+ yr old

Number of Admissions: 1,091 children

Average Length of care: 24 days. (with a range of a few hrs to a few months. Although i know a teenage boy who has been waiting to find a loving home for a year)
                        
Admissions by ethnicity: 58 % Hispanic, 27% Caucasian, 7% African-American,5% Asian, 1% Pacific Islander & 2% Other.

Reason for Referral:  46% Neglect/lack of care   (heart breaking to me)
                                     21% Abandoned ; unable or unavailable to provide care (heart breaking)
                                     12% Physical abuse
                                      5% Emotional Abuse (i bet this % is higher, but harder to prove evidence of)
                                      5% Sexual Abuse
                                     11% Other  

Children get released to:  38%  Relative/Family friend
                                            33% Foster parent
                                            12% Parent
                                            7% Group Home
                                           6% Temporary shelter home
                                            4% Other-hopsital, Juvenile Hall,or other county or state social agency 

Pacific Youth Correctional Ministries conducts Sunday and Wed church/Bible study services for the children. I am blessed to be a part of loving on these children who so desperately NEED it.

Hebrews 13:5-6  "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.' So we say with confidence,

'The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid.What can mere mortals do to me?”

Lets be fighting in prayer for these children who are helpless and in this situation. They did not choose to be there. Lets also fight in prayer for their parent/families/relatives who equally need God's love and healing. I pray these children find safe, caring, loving new homes and are raised in God's truth! Pray against ABUSE. It is NEVER OK. I HAVE SUFFERED THROUGH DIFFERENT ABUSES IN MY LIFETIME & I KNOW THE TRAUMA, PAIN,  GUILT, & SHAME IT CAN BRING. ONLY GOD CAN HEAL THIS WITH HIS MIRACULOUS LOVE.

May we all count our blessings today. Tell your loved ones you LOVE them. Be thankful. Pray for them. Serve them. Every GOOD and PERFECT gift comes from God.

Para-Chaplain Michelle  <3 

Incarcerated Youth Update!

Last year 2011: Pacific Youth Correctional Ministries came in contact with 13,000 teenagers!!!

It will be interesting to see what the total # will be at the end of 2012.

In 1985 Pacific Youth was started because of the desperate need to reach out to the incarcerated youth in Orange County and to share the Gospel and make disciples. The majority of prison ministries in America are focused just on adults.The youth have been severely neglected,outcasted & overlooked. Pacific Youth is a very unique ministry and one of a kind in the nation!

More than half a million young people are currently being imprisoned each year in more than 100 juvenile detention facilties across America. Criminal statistics of the FBI show that aggressive crimes committed by adolescents are close to exceeding in number the total aggressive crimes committed by all other age groups.

And THIS is my DAILY /FULL TIME/MINISTRY/ life mission!! Lots of work to do, as you can see!!

****THIS WEEK ALONE i personally had the chance to interact/minister to over 100 teenagers!!!!! (67 at church this morning, 10+ at Mon/Tues Bible studies, one-on-one discipleship counseling, & other encounters on the "Outs")****

If you have prayed for me, encouraged me, financially supported me or volunteered in any way=YOU have invested in all of these youth & families' lives also! Every Salvation is added to your account also!!! Can you imagine the impact on His Kingdom if the  majority of those teens believed in Him, put their FAITH in ACTION, & went out & changed ORANGE COUNTY, CALIFORNIA, AMERICA AND THE WORLD FOR HIM?!! It is happening folks! Believe it or not, i have been eye witnessing it firsthand!

Wednesday-  I met up for an hour with a young 17yr old young man full of energy in Intake Unit Z. He had attended my Bible study Tues evening & then requested to see me & get his own Bible. I delivered his own new Bible and sat down to hear his life story.He really opened up to me and PASSIONATELY shared with me how he wants to be a pastor someday or a military chaplain. He has a HUNGER to study His Word and share it. He was thrilled to get his own Bible. I told him that i have been ministering to incarcerated youth for about 8yrs & i have NEVER met a teen so enthusiastic about sharing with others. He is also a talented rapper  & wants to rap for the LORD to glorify Him & reach out to other troubled teens. How refreshing this was for both of us: for me to hear it & for him to get encouraged by me. God was/is at work within this boy! We have a future leader and pastor here! He is a skilled football player,on top of that!Please pray that he stays on track with the LORD & that his fire & passion for sharing the Gospel never gets extinguished!  I saw him at church in the Hall this morning & he came up & shook my hand & had a big smile on his face- he was excited that i simply remembered his face & his 1st name. (they get called by their last names all day)

Thursday Discipleship!-   God calls us to share the Gospel & make disciples (followers). I have had the honor of discipling a young woman the last several months. I meet up with her for an hour each week  & study the Bible with her/go through discipleship materials. She has been incarcerated for 10 months now. She placed her faith in Jesus Christ when she came into Juvenile Hall! She has about 14 months left of time & i get to spend that time with her. This girl has a 1yr old little boy, who i have met. I have been able to see the GROWTH & MATURITY in her over the past few months. I have witnessed BIG changes in  her attitude, thoughts & actions. She is extremely grateful for the time we get to meet & we walk through life together. She is my little sister in Christ & i am extremely PROUD of her! She is already being a leader to the young ladies in her unit & standing up for what's right, even when it's difficult. Please pray that she continues to be strong in Christ!

THANK YOU for your prayers and support! Please feel free to share this blog/blog link with anyone/post on Facebook... spread the word! If you would like to receive my weekly email with the specific names/prayer requests from the youth, please let me know! God bless you!

Matthew 28:19-20 "Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.”

Isaiah 58:6 "Is not this the fast that I have chosen? to loose the bonds of wickedness, to undo the heavy burdens, and to let the oppressed go free, and that you break every yoke?"

Watching a 5yr old girl being buried...

Saturday June 23rd, I eye witnessed a precious 5yr old  girl's lifeless body being placed in a body bag by police men in Santa Ana after being hit by a car and immediately passing away. I didn't know the family but i instantly KNEW i had to reach out to help, in any way i could.Her mother and 6yr old sister were hit also, and were rushed immediately to the hospital and barely survived. That was 13 days ago.

From day one, on June 23rd, I was steppinng out in faith, praying for a miracle for the precious 5yr old girl. Believing and  praying for the impossible-that God would breath life into her lifeless body and wake her up from the dead. for 13 days a few of my friends and i prayd in faith for this, with all of our heart! Exercising my faith on a whole new level than ever before.I heard word that her viewing ceremony was last night, so i showed up at 5pm and stayed until 11pm when they closed the building and the family/loved ones left also.For those 6hrs i prayed with all of  my heart, mind and soul. From the beginning, God gave a few of my friends and i favor.We were introduced to the father, little sister (she has miraculously  healed since being hit by a car 13days ago!) and aunt right away. Hundreds of people were there. My friends and i were the ONLY white people there too. There was a Catholic service and then a Christian service.The aunt of the little girl being viewed in her casket came up to my friend and i as we were seated in the back of the building and asked us to come up to the microphone for 15min to pray for everyone/share!!! Wow, what an invitation! She didn't know us either!So i said "yes, i will" and then started sweating and getting nervous, praying for God to give me the right words for a crowd of grieving people.I had 2 minutes before i was to go up.

I get up to the front of the room, and begin to share the Gospel and speak of faith. Asking people to get on their knees!!! These words and this courage is ONLY from God. I am still in shock! Shared that God loves us and is close to the broken hearted.That He desires a personal relationship with ALL of us and desires no one to perish. A few children came up to the front and got on their knees praying. Child-like faith! It was beautiful.PEOPLE WERE ON THEIR KNEES IN REPENTANCE! I SAW PEOPLE ASKING FOR FORGIVENESS FROM GOD FOR THEIR SINS! GOD DID MIRACLES! HE RESURRECTED MANY SPIRITUALLY LAST NIGHT!! THANK YOU JESUS!!! Before i came up and spoke, i had an opportunity to pray over the body of the girl with her family, a very special yet heart breaking moment. (i boldly asked him if i could touch her hand and pray over her, and he said yes!)Again, was taking a leap of faith, believing that God could heal her if that was HIS plan for her life. Nothing happened, but the father was SO appreciative of our faith and prayers and compassion. he and the family kept thanking us. Later that evening, around 60 people got on their knees and prayed and weeped.

For the 6hrs i was there, God DID do miraculous things. Even though the ONE thing i was praying for the most didn't happen, He did SO many other things.The 33yr old woman who hit the 2 girls and the mom on June 23rd was a blonde haired white woman. She was under the influence and also ran a red light and tried to escape after the hit.So me...being a white, blonde haired 32yr old woman...up in front of hundreds of hispanic men, women and children, weeping over the girl.....had bigger influence than i know. I didn't want to leave when they kicked everyone out at 11pm. I wanted to keep praying over  her. I did not want to accept that she wasn't going to be raised from the dead.But i have to remember that His ways are not our ways and His thoughts are not our thoughts.

Today i attended the mass/funeral ceremony.Hundreds attended.Saw the family and told them i was praying for them. Saw them weeping with sorrow.Followed everyone over to the graveyard where we placed carnations on her casket...

 and watched them place her into the ground and  had the tractors cover her with dirt. Then it really hit me....this was the end of her life here on earth=5yrs. I was told that before she was hit crossing the street, she had given her father a bible and inside the bible she placed a picture of a traffic light that she had drawn.This 5yr old girl had shared God's love and truth with her own dad....

Fighting the tears back again right now....i know without faith we can not please God. I know God was pleased of our faith, even though what we prayed for wasn't answered.But i do believe God is resurrecting  the Santa Ana community through this tragic event.Hundreds, maybe even thousands, heard the Gospel a few times last night and today. They were faced with the reality of life, death and Eternity. I will not let this cause me to doubt and decrease my faith. I pray that this experience will only strengthen my faith.When i woke up this morning, Satan kept trying to tell me i was a fool for praying in faith -"oh look, you prayed for something and it didn't happen, how foolish! You should be embarrassed!" But i know Satan is an accuser and liar. Oh LORD, send your healing, comfort touch to the father and little sister. And to the mother who is still in critical condition at the hospital....my heart goes out to them...thank you all for your faith and prayers and support....   <3

Hebrews 11:6  "And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him."

Heart Construction...

God meets us wherever we are at....BUT He loves us too much to KEEP us where we are at...

A friend reminded me recently "Michelle, God is doing MORE in you than THROUGH you right now. Yes, He is doing amazing things around you & using you to do great things for Him, BUT He is doing a miraculous work IN you!"  **Thank you, Israel, for your insight, encouragement, & for challenging me**    :)

It is MUCH easier for me to blog about an event & updates on changed lives of the imprisoned youth & gang youth on the streets. There have been several events in the past few days that i could write 2-3 blogs on. I had the privilege of being in contact with almost 200 teens in the last few days (inside prison & on the streets).It is MORE difficult to fully express what exactly God is doing INSIDE me. And i don't want to neglect sharing about the most important aspect of my life...my relationship with my Creator, Savior, LORD, Best Friend, Redeemer..the list goes on. He is at work: The beautiful contruction & remodeling of my heart & thoughts.....

I thought that living out of a backpack while traveling/serving around the world with 65+ people & living in 10 foreign countries was going to be the PEAK of my adventures in life. Although it was the BEST year of my life, so far....i believe that the ADVENTURE has only just begun.This has all been preparation. God has gigantic plans for my life, & i am giddy like a 5yr old on Christmas Eve. Not just physical adventures of meeting people, walking down new streets & seeing communities change for the glory of the LORD...but adventures of my HEART.

Philippians 1:6 "...being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus." 

God doesn't abandon the construction site of our hearts...He is constantly purifying our hearts, like silver through the fire. The # of completion in the Bible is 7. I find it ironic that there are 7  steps to the process of refining silver! Now....God will never abandon the construction site, but many times we put up road blocks & interefere/delay it.He does the work in our hearts, but we need to be open & have a humble heart for Him to be able to mold it & shape it.

Psalm 66:10 "For you, O God, tested us; you refined us like silver."

 James 4:10 "Humble yourselves before the Lord, and He will lift you up."

Change He has done in me lately: I honestly can't put it into words!! I am struggling right now for accurate words to fully express what's going on in me. I know for sure He has allowed my heart to be completely SHATTERED for the struggling men, women, teens & children of the lovely city of Santa Ana. Just like a bullet penetrated this glass & shattered it, so has He done with my heart...

COMPASSION. Compassion compels  & requires action. Just like LOVE is a verb= An ACTION.I can't walk past people in need anymore without at least stopping to pray for them or helping out with a physical need if i have the resources/time to. Usually we do, but we choose not to, for whatever reasons: fear, selfishness, greed, "too busy"...etc. God has WRECKED my heart, i can no longer pass them by. Feeling sorry isn't enough anymore.

Don't get me wrong, i can't FIX their problems & poverty & be their Savior. That is why i point them to the One who can save their soul & also rescue them. He delivers those who cry for help & He sees EVERY tear that falls. When Jesus walked the Earth, He had compasison on people & SHOWED it with His actions. This is just a small % of what He is doing in my life, on a greater scale than ever before.

CAUTION: This blog is NOT written to brag about me. I am not worthy of that & never will be. My Daddy in Heaven gets the credit & glory. He is worthy of the praise & miraculous TRANSFORMATION in my life. Studying His Word on a deeper level lately has been washing my thoughts & heart of the garbage the world dumps on it.

My faith's growng stronger every day. His boldness in me is increasing, like a lion. I am not the same as i was yesterday. I'm more hungry for Him, less hungry for the empty things of this world. My soul thirsts for Him like a parched deer searching for water in the desert. I find my REST in Him & my PEACE & JOY. I have found CONTENTMENT. COMPLETE SATISFACTION. At 32 yrs old, i never thought i would be back living with my parents in Fountain Valley where i grew up. Not married, no kids of my own.(But i am thankful to have  that provision of a roof over my head & to spend time with my family whom i love & am so grateful for.And even though i don't have my own kids, i have plenty of kids/teens i am looking after/mentoring) AND working/serving fulltime w/gang members/prisoners...without getting PAID!!! haha God has a great sense of humor. Please pray that i can soon move out and pay for rent in Santa Ana. (Please prayerfully consider partnering up with what God is doing in these communities by sponsoring me monthly!! Donation info is on the righthand side ------->>)


If we are COMFORTABLE, it is very possible that our very comfort is what is delaying His construction......      

**thanks for reading & for your support....& the journey continues... Love, Michelle**

Saturday June 23: From Tragedy to Rejoicing

12:45pm Saturday:I am driving,on my way to help out with a Lives Worth Saving Gang Intervention BBQ outreach in central Santa Ana on a certain street that is notorious for heavy gang/drug activity. I receive a text from a friend, alerting me of a tragic accident/crime that had just occurred on the same street as the event.A mother & her 2 little girls were hit crossing the street in a crosswalk by a driver who ran a red light, under the influence.The 5yr old girl was instantly killed. The mother & other little girl in critical condition, being rushed to the hospital.....

My heart dropped. I began to cry as i was driving over. I went from being excited about playing games with the kids to completely heart broken and in shock, not feeling like "socializing at a BBQ event." My first reaction was to text him back and say "i am praying God raises her from the dead".That is not my usual reaction, but I have FAITH that God COULD do it, if He wanted to. I parked & walked past the scene. Saw one of the most horrible sights: police gathering the lifeless body of the 5yr old child into a  large body bag...

I was a mess. Everyone was out in their frontyards & on the streets watching, grieving...some unfortunately not shocked or phased by it because they have become calloused by the regular occurance of these tragic accidents...

The woman who ran the red light was not only under the influence but she tried to hit and run, but a neighbor blocked the get away car, causing her to crash and be stopped long enough for police to come and arrest her.Please pray for the father/husband who is grieving. Pray for the mother and her 6yr old daughter who are in critical condition in the hospital.And if you believe God can raise the 5yr old from the dead, join in me in prayer for that also...IF that is God's will, of course. Could you imagine?!! I can. Wouldn't be the 1st time Jesus raised a child from the dead (Mark 5:35-43)Please also pray for the 33yr old woman who is now locked up, facing manslaughter charges. Praise God that people from our Lives Worth Saving were there to minister to the father/husband and loved ones/neighbors as they grieved during this tragedy. We were there to be His light, comfort, peace, joy and love in the middle of desperation.

I arrive & help set up for the event, still a mess.Not in the mood to lead games for the kids, but i ask for prayer and then God gives me the strength to.About 30 kids showed up and had a BLAST playing games. We shared the Gospel with them and showed them His love and encouragement. These kids brought ME  joy when i was down. They made me smile and laugh. Many of the neighborhood kids do not have fathers around and good role models to look up to.Here are some pictures of me being a big kid with them :)

We had games for the kids, resource tables for youth/adults to help them find jobs and get back into school programs.We had a prayer table. The youth group from Pastor Kevin's church did a skit for the youth.It was powerful!

 A woman who lives in the apartment complex accepted Jesus that day!Got to pray with her and encourage her. She said that years of guilt and shame were lifted off her that day! Thank You Jesus!!We had been ministereing to her and husband and teenage sons for the last few months, helping them meet their physical needs but also spiritual needs.They still have many difficult struggles: please keep this family in prayer.Five young brothers (all under the age of 13) who were  playing games with me that day...have a father who has been locked up in  prison. No dad around. This scenerio is way too common. This is NOT ok. But this is the cycle that continues.....

So many needs.....but Jesus is using us to reach ONE LIFE at a time :)

Saturday evening: 6-10pm: My LWS team and i hit the streets. We run into 2 teenage boys: a 15yr old and a 19yr old. Both at risk youth and both hungry for Jesus! We shared the Gospel with them and they wanted to surrender their lives to the LORD. Here is a pic of me and the 19yr old! He is now my little brother in Christ!

I have high hopes for this young man.He has a good job and is working towards being a head chef at his own restaurant! I told him "i am so proud of you and i believe in you!" He responded "No one has ever told me that before. My parents were never around and never told me.That means so much to me,Thank you" Wow. Please pray he keeps his eyes on Jesus.

So many teens out there with NO father figures. Breaks my heart. Frustrates me.Men need to step up and be the LEADERS that God created them to be. These kids NEED you. They look up to you. They need to hear "i am proud of you. I love you."

Saturday....a day of death and life. A day of physical death but also a day of spiritual birth..... many lives were saved today..angels were rejoicing. Even though there were intense moments of grief...

This is my crazy, intense, beautiful life...

Surf, Sand, & Smiles

Saturday June 9th a few Lives Worth Saving team mates & i brought 10 kids from inner city Santa Ana to a Crystal Cove beach day 12pm-4:45pm. That picture is with a  sweet 10yr old boy named Jesus who had NEVER stepped foot onto a beach before!He & the other kids made sand castles, boogie boarded & played in the surf, some for the very 1st time!!! These kids have grown up on a notorious street where there is a lot of gang violence, drugs, abuse, alcoholism, etc. These kids (ages 8-13yrs old) walk to school in fear everyday. During these several hours of carefree beach fun,they were FREE to just be KIDS! And their smiles never ended. It was hard to even lure them OUT of the water to feed them lunch! They (and i) were amused by the squirrels  and sea gulls attempting to take off with their half-eaten cheetos bags haha

To me, throwing a nerf football around in the surf with a boy named Brandon for an hour isn't something  HUGE or extraordinary. BUT...afterwards he told me that no one ever spends that time with him to play.That was hard to hear. I am thankful that God can use us in the LITTLE ways to make GIGANTIC impacts in peoples' lives.This day was unforgettable for me, and i know it will be for those kids! We NEED to catch these kids early in life before they head down the wrong path! I DO NOT want to see their beautiful faces behind the walls of Juvenile Hall, YGC, Joplin, or YLA!!!!!

I personally had countless number of people who invested into my life as a child, teenager & throughout my 20's: teachers, youth pastors/leaders, family members, friends, & others who crossed my path. If we aren't investing in the lives of youth & many of them don't have a stable family  environment to receive that from- WHERE and WHO will they get that from? Many times, sadly, in gangs.

Kids/teens who grow up without a father around, especially in this community, have a very high percentage of joining a gang, committing crimes=ending up arrested/in Juvenile Hall, prison, or tragically-dead.And since i have been ministering to imprisoned teenagers for the last 7years, i hear story after story of how their fathers are involved with gangs, abandoned them, are abusive, or are in prison. Many times the moms also are involved in drugs & are simply in denial or turn their head to what is going on in their own homes. Or are intimidated by their own teens/violent drug use/anger & behaviors. 

Makes me even more thankful for  my wonderful loving parents!My father and mother who have always been there for me. My father always worked hard  to provide for my mom & my sister & i.My mom always made sure she was there when i got home from school. They attended every swim meet, basketball game, volleyball game, & prays daily/weekly for my my Juvenile Hall teens and i.He cared enough to be strict with me & discipline me, out of love. I appreciate him NOW more than ever before.But i am also grateful that God, my Heavenly Father, is a Father to the fatherless.Each one of these children are so precious and valueable.The lack of fathers & good male role models for these youth really break my heart.Some of the Christian men in Lives Worth Saving & in the community of Santa Ana are realizing this great gap & are beginning to stand up & make a difference!

SOLUTION?=BUILDING RELATIONSHIPS, INVESTING IN THE LIVES OF THE MEN, WOMEN & CHILDREN & CONTINUE TO SHARE GOD'S LOVE & TRUTH. DISCIPLESHIP.MENTORING.WALKING THROUGH LIFE WITH PEOPLE. LIVING IN COMMUNITY.  (which is why i will be moving there, as soon as i fundraise enough support money to move out! I am in process of looking for a room to rent in those neighborhoods)

More pics from Crystal Cove Beach Day :)

Jesus said, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these." Matthew 19:14

I recognized one of these young girl's faces & realized that i had met her a few months ago while walking the dark allies of Santa Ana during our Gang Intervention hours.I believe one or more of her family members are deeply involved in gang violence, putting her & her family/friends in jeopardy daily. PLEASE  pray for these children, that they would continue to have Goldy people in their life to guide them! Kids sadly get jumped into gangs as young as 8yrs old!

I'll be sending another blog soon, updating you on other ministries/events going on & what God is doing in the lives of the youth/communities!If you are interested in helping me with rent money/living expenses, my donation info is on  the right side of my blog site!I am in great need of consistent monthly supporters!But thankful for anything, every bit helps! Thanks for reading & for your prayers & support! In Christ, Michelle

For you, O Lord, are my hope, my trust, O Lord, from my youth.
Psalm 71:5